Christena Cleveland surprised me. I did not expect her casual language and dry humor, which instantly drew me into her narrative of Ben. Ben was apparently the "wrong" kind of Christian, and Cleveland didn't want to have anything to do with him, rather associating herself with people who more closely shared her "right" values. As I read about her struggles with "the other," though, I realized just how hypocritical Christians can be - touting Jesus' love and acceptance on the one hand, while pushing so-called heretics to their fates. And following this unconscious revelation, a terrible feeling crawled into my soul, for I knew I had done the same thing. How many people over the course of my college career had I - for one reason or another - decided I just didn't like and tried to avoid? There was that one girl who never smiled at me. There was the girl whom everyone loved because of her bright and fun personality - which she never showed around me. There was the guy who creeped me out and seemed to pop up everywhere I went. My assumptions ran high, and in most of these cases, they were proved wrong once I got to know the people. That girl who never smiled? She rarely smiled at anyone because that was just her personality, and she was actually pretty nice. The girl who shut down every time she was around me? We're not friends, but I eventually realized she doesn't hate me. The guy who creeped me out? He's just a little awkward, and he seems like a strong Christian. But even if these people did live up to my perceived image of them, does that give me any right as a Christian to push them aside? Jesus says that we merit nothing if we love those who love us. It's like demanding a prize for breathing. Everyone does it. But we - the beloved of Christ, us princes and princesses of the eternal Kingdom - are called to love our enemies. That's what makes people turn their heads, makes them ask, makes them curious about this God who cares less about externalities and more about the attitude of our hearts.
I often find myself falling into a similar trap. I tend to make unwarranted assumptions about people solely based on the fact that they do not directly align with my values, standards, and expectations. For example, if a person does not attend church regularly, I am tempted to make the assumption that the person is not a very committed Christian. Just because I value church attendance does not mean that I can make assumptions about another person's faith walk. It is extremely hard not to make assumptions about people who hold different values, beliefs, and expectations because we are constantly drawn to familiarity. We are naturally inclined to gravitate toward people who are similar to us. Since we surround ourselves with familiar people, we tend to fall into the trap of making assumptions about those who act differently because we do not take the time to build relationships with them and truly understand their values and beliefs. I believe it is crucial to remember that everyone is made in the image of God; despite the fact that everyone is created with unique values and interests. Since this is true, we should make an effort to build relationships with others that hold different values to better understand them rather than making unwarranted assumptions.
ReplyDeleteHypocrisy is the name of the game. It reminded me a lot of the hypocritical Pharisees from the Gospels--we learned about them in Sunday School and wondered how they could be so arrogant and mean. Now, after reading these first couple chapters of Cleveland's, we find out WE'RE the Pharisees. We're the ones holding others to standards we set for them that are no where in Scripture; we're the ones surrounding ourselves with like-minded individuals to make us feel better about ourselves; we're the ones who think we're better than other Christians. The reality, as you state it, is that we're not.
ReplyDeleteWe're just as sinful as anyone else, and our opinions (be it political, quasi-religious, or controversial) doesn't define us as Christians. What does define us is unity, which is what Christ called us to--and is what the Pharisees ran from.
I appreciate your honesty and ability to connect with Cleveland's writing. Looking forward to reading more reflections from you!
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